Last night I met with ah Fai for dinner--we went to BJ's Cupertino. I wanted to see what the singles scene is like there on weekends. Ah Fai said late Happy Hour is from 10:00 P.M. (10:30?) to closing. KK and her husband had gone there before, and claimed a lot of FOBs frequented the restaurant. All three of them claim that it is popular with De Anza students on weekdays. It was the first time that I've been to any BJ's for dinner -- usually I shy away from the restaurant because the parking lot is packed.

We ordered the chicken lettuce wrap for an appetizer. It was ok, but didn't really compare to good mu shu pork. The horseradish mustard for the wrap was rather hot, but better than the sweet soy sauce (hoisin?) mix. I ordered a hamburer (theCuban), which wasn't as good as the California. Ham isn't really a good topping for a hamburger. The hamburgers are BJ's are not as good as Counter or Red Robin; even Fuddruckers burgers might be better, despite being saltier. I thought ah Fai's chicken fried stick was overcooked. I probably won't be going back to BJ's for the food any time soon--the quality of the food doesn't merit the price. (As far as I can tell, the restaurant as a meeting place for singles doesn't make up for the price either. But 1/2 off appetizers during happy hour may be enough of an incentive to try going there at that time.)

I didn't drink any alcohol tonight, though I did want to try their Oktoberfest lager. It's been a while since I had alcohol, and I figured I should determine what my limits are, first, and besides, I was driving tonight, so I didn't want to take any chances. I still have some Chimay at home to sample.

Ah Fei told me that Elephant Bar is cheaper, especially when you use coupons. I don't like that chain that much, either. The fusion fare that is served there isn't that good... Teenagers and young people like to go to that restaurant apparently. I remember when going to Chili's was a big deal for me and the family, back in the day. It was a step up from Denny's. Who goes to Chili's these days?

There are not too many pubs in Cupertino; then again, Cupertino is still a suburb in many ways, even though they have been trying to build up its commercial area for a long time.

We ended up staying at BJ's Brewhouse for 2 hours. I did some people-watching. I even kept eye contact with one woman when she looked back... looking away when "caught" is a habit I have to break. I enjoyed my time there, even though I didn't meet any new people. Talking to ah Fei was sufficient. I found that I missed going out. Because of the expense involved, one needs to have a certain minimum income level in order to "have a life" and to be able to socialize with other people. Not many people entertain at home these days, and I don't know anyone who would attempt a mixer in order for their single friends to meet one another. (Though the OD and his wife did try to set me up with someone else.)

Having what passes for a "normal" life in suburbia may be necessary for a psychological balance. Staying home all of the time or doing things alone probably isn't that good for one's mental health, unless one is called to be a hermit. I don't think that is the case for myself, even if I joke that it is. But the expense and other negatives should tell us how much our communities lack good culture and order. No doubt even if I had the money to go out more, I'd start to remember how pointless it is, since it is difficult to meet new people in such environments.

I noticed that there were a lot of Indians were eating together, and the East Asians as well. Some Asians and Indians were eating in ethnically mixed groups -- colleagues from work? There is a lot of self-segregation that goes on among young people. You don't see this just in high schools and colleges. Some think this is not a good thing for a "multicultural" society.

There were some Caucasians eating at the restaurant as well, though you don't really associate Caucasians with Cupertino these days.

Having some attachment to a place and a community is an integral part of the lay vocation.

But it seems unlikely that women you'd meet in pubs or on online dating sites would be willing to embrace the simple life. They may look good (through the help of make-up and other enhancements), but is there more to them than their outward behavior and speech would indicate? And then there's the fact that E. Asian men are rather undesirable to women of other ethnicities. (While Caucasians are more desirable to American women of all ethnicities.)

I'm still thinking of checking out Sacramento, and I'm looking into meetup.com as well...