Civility Does Matter

But so does having appropriate responses to aggressive members of other tribes. "Individuals" need to find their tribe; civic nationalism is dead.

Does civility still matter? In an increasingly polarized age, individuals are grappling with this question. Join a panel of experts in a discussion on civility on April 9th at 12:00pm ET. Register here: https://t.co/FZxQTxXHfv

hosted by: @baylorinwash & @HumanEcologyCUA

— Initiative on Faith & Public Life (@FPLatAEI) March 26, 2021

Bowtie Conservatism

We are in a culture war, souls are at stake, and not everything can be reduced to dialectic. Rhetoric is a necessary tool of the statesman.

"When conservatives surrender their civility to the abrasiveness, they sacrifice a part of the tradition that makes them conservative."

- @mrJSDavenport takes on cancel culture with a nod toward prudence and Russell Kirk's negation of ideology: https://t.co/w7C77xoIr4 pic.twitter.com/1BQgG6YMb6

— Russell Kirk Center (@KirkCenter) October 1, 2020

Old School Manners for Men

killed off by multicultural mass urban population centers...

AoM

The Anatomy of Etiquette: How to Be an Old School Gentleman From Head to Toe https://t.co/5pByI1EseJ pic.twitter.com/K2pVYzjltx

— Art of Manliness (@artofmanliness) July 29, 2020

A Loss of Decorum

Steve Sailer asks: Has Society Become More or Less Huggy?

Fake hugging seems to abound among Millenials -- I say fake because it is exchanged between people who are nothing more than superficial acquaintances, and between women and beta orbiters or nice guys. In the case of the latter maybe it's more of a tease than anything else. Do Millenial men exchange hugs with one another? I haven't witnessed it. Given the questionable origin of the handshake, some traditionalists may eschew it, but I think it is well suited as a sign of familiarity and fraternity among men who are friends -- but less appropriate between strangers, even though this is not its current meaning.

Be a Churl

Dalrock: White Knights vs. Churls

OEM

America of Yesteryear

Good manners make life with other people, especially strangers more pleasant, and preserve the polite fiction that a community exists.

When tourists are morons

A World With No Etiquette

No standards, no enforcement, no expectations. A world of social idiots.

Crisis: Dignitas: The Manners of Humility by Fr. George W. Rutler

The Hat in the West

How to Treat Members not in the Group

The war of standards, or what rule of etiquette?

A question that will become more important as people realize that the modern nation-state, especially as it has been manipulated by those in power through immigration, is no political community.

What are the proper norms for interpersonal relations, especially members of the opposite sex? While it is not necessary to antagonize strangers without reason, how should men respond to hostile women or feminists? Someone would say that we should uphold chivalry or previous codes of conduct for gentlemen. But is that a proper response to those who are hostile to us and may even seek to destroy our livelihoods? Sociability/affability is a virtue require for living with others -- but this may be restricted to those with whom one forms a community. For those who have shown themselves to not be allies, avoidance, silence, or some word of disapproval or rejection may be necessary and justified. Some may fear economic retaliation in the workplace by SJWs -- that is a legitimate consideration. But should men be willing to cut ties with those who do not share the same culture nor seek to be a part of their community? I think so -- the cutting of ties is the last remedy with respect to those who will not change their behavior, and men need to be willing to go through with it in order to protect themselves, their families, and their communities. This may require that they change jobs or where they reside, so that they can live with integrity.

"But that's not being nice!" Or, "you're alienating someone instead of being Christ to them." If they are of good will and can accept correction, then correction can be given. Otherwise, it is they who have alienated themselves by embracing a prideful, unnatural ideology that is detrimental to women, men, and society at large. Perhaps if enough virtuous people (especially men) signal to them that their acceptance of this ideology and any other objectionable behavior is unacceptable they may seek to change and be reconciled.

What about African-American community? If they do not seek to observe white standards of conduct or be part of white America, then what is to be done other than separation?

Related:
Was Lloyd Alexander a feminist? Certainly Eilonwy is a princess who hates being treated like a mere "girl" -- does she learn a lesson later in the trilogy? Or are the books written by someone ignorant of the real dangers of a barbaric age, and the necessity for women to seek protection from men?

Lisa Saracco on The Courtier by Baldassar Castiglione

Medievalists.net: Defining the gentleman and the gentlewoman in the Italian Renaissance

Defining the gentleman and the gentlewoman in the Italian Renaissance by Lisa Saracco

Political Systems and Definitions of Gender Roles, edited by Ann Katherine Isaacs (University of Pisa, 2001)

Super Cool Biz

The Japanese government started to push a more casual summer business/work dress code last year, after the tsunami and earthquake, in order to get people to adapt to reduced availability of electricity, and by extension, air conditioning. There was a feature on clothing for this trend on NHK World's Tokyo Fashion Express. It confirms what I thought about the compatability of the traditional Western business dress code and hotter climates - they're not, unless one has cheap energy for A/C. Which makes one wonder: what the British do during the hot summer months? Bide their time until they make it inside a cooled environment? What did the gentlemen do in the 19th century? Pampered nobles probably would not put up with the sweat that comes with wearing a dress coat in hot weather in the name of tradition.

The wearing of a jacket may be a marker of status, or just required by tradition, but what can one do to make this possible and healthy when the weather is hot? It is one thing to have multiple layers in a hot dry climate for protecting the body and conserving water, but what about where it is more humid?

Links:
Japan's MOE Promoting 'Super Cool Biz' Campaign for 2012 to Help Save Energy
Japan’s “cool” summer dress code
It’s Baaack! The Return of (Super?) Cool Biz
SUPER COOL BIZ: JAPAN'S SUMMER DRESS CODE
Cool Biz

Only in Uhmerica

Can adult women wear their flannel pajamas in public and not see anything wrong with that.

It doesn't help matters that their pajamas resembles the scrubs of some nurses and doctors, even though the material may be different. Those medical professionals generally have no qualms wearing those scrubs outside a hospital environment.

I saw three women wearing pajamas today at a certain county park; presumably they were camping there, but that does not justify their choice of attire.

I have not seen Uhmerican males wearing their pjs in public - maybe one. I suppose there are still some boundaries that they won't cross... yet.

In an Age of Picky Eaters...

Hospitality at a Fractured Table by David J. Walbert

And then there are those people who don't eat grains! I wonder if those who follow more traditional diets are as picky.

So how do we educate about health? And can that be done when we are guests at another's home? Most things can be tolerated under the 80/20 rule, and educating about healthier diets by example would be a good start. (How many people would actually complain that you aren't serving enough carbs?)

Misc.
Deti on what he means by "traditional patriarchial society" and the education of women.
Vox: Emotion, logic, and dishonesty

A Repeated Complaint

That I've stated on this blog and partly explains my trepidation (and mostly explains my repulsion) that keeps me from visiting one of these events. I posted this video for the Sacramento group rather recently.

Some more videos of local groups:
2012 San Francisco Folk Fest Contra Dance
Palo Alto Contra Dance with STEAM
Palo Alto Contra Dance with Community Band! (pt.2)

From the mid-west, featuring Perpetual e-Motion:


(more from ITMDG - looks like I missed the opportunity to hear them in person at Felton Hall earlier this year. I hope they'll be back next year.)

If you take a look at the videos available on youtube for various Contra/ECD events in the U.S., dressing very casually for the dancing is the norm. (Some samples below.) On various websites for CD/ECD visitors are told that there is no dress code but to wear something comfortable since physical activity is involved. Shorts? Blue jeans? T-shirts? How many of those dancing are really presentable to others, not looking like slobs? Although the Sacramento group is rather fit, but this is not always the case. Obesity may not be the fault of Uhmericans, but that doesn't mean one shouldn't feel shame. (As opposed to guilt.) They should try to conceal it through their clothing, instead of revealing it, or worse, drawing attention to it through poor choice in clothing.

In order for it to be fun and welcoming, casual dress is tolerated and becomes the norm. Organizers don't want to turn people away because they need people to attend in order to keep the dances going. You don't want to stand out or appear to be too snooty by going semi-formal. But an you can associate with people with looser standards in dance? Even if you can ignore for the moment the standard in question, the sight of people adhering to disparate dress standards seems rather ridiculous.

Dressing the part in a historical re-enacment (or role-playing) looks much better by comparison:




The JASNA Regency Ball from last year:


Of course this may only make sense for English Country Dances, and not so much with American Contra Dance. Am I saying that ECD/CD enthusiasts have to dress up in Regency costumes or other attire from the 19th century? No, but simple clothing that is decent in appearance, a dress shirt and slacks, would be much more dignified than the t-shirt, shorts, and obvious athletic shoes. Some places may require certain shoes so that they do not leave marks on the floor, but surely there are "dressy-looking" shoes that meet this requirement? Actually, I would have no problems with them going barefoot, though this would make dances that involve some sort of clogging impracticable. Some may claim that going barefoot to a dance, while wearing "traditionally" more formal clothing is rather incongruous. What about dressy minimalist shoes, then?



Dressing too casually represents a failure to respect one's self and others. The music, the dance patterns, what the occasion represents all refer to a standard of order that we no longer have and yet some of us yearn for it, though perhaps unconsciously. They are tied to beauty, which is part of their appeal. And yet we don't see that casual dress violates the decorum that such dances represent, not only historically but even intrinsically, since they should be special occasions of festivity for the community. I suspect that when folk dances (square dances or contra dances or the like) were events for the community, no one dressed down for them, or as if they had just left the field or work. We, on the other hand, who have the money and the gas for such hobbies take the liberty of attending in whatever clothing we like. That is rather self-indulgent and narcissistic.

If ECD or CD is to become a dance for the "vulgar masses," we should expect people to rise about the vulgarity that is Uhmericanism? We need to understand that dances are more than a private hobby or leisurely activity. They need to be reintegrated back into some semblance of an authentic communal life.

Some might argue that since such dances take place in a gym or some other minimalist community place that it would be out of place to dress nice. But the solution isn't to dress down, but to spruce the place up with tasteful decorations and the like. A basketball court may not be the ideal place to have a dance, but if it is the only open area where people can congregate, then one must make do.

As for those groups that advertise themselves as being gay-friendly -- if there is a sex imbalance and you are alternating partners throughout a dance, you may end up dancing with someone of the same sex, with the other person playing the incorrect part. Now this happens now even when there are too many heterosexual women and not enough men, and may have happened in the past. Where does one draw the line between practical necessity (as in the case when women outnumber men) and an affront to traditional morals? When one removes distinctions or any reference to gender roles one has gone too far.


Youth Flock To Contra Dancing

Related links: Country Dance and Song Society

Some more videos after the jump:

Men Crossing Their Legs

CR is derisive: Universal Logo Of The Feminized Male

It is very common for British men and actors (Jeremy Irons in Brideshead Revisited?) to cross their legs at the knees, many Hong Kong and South Korean actors and celebs do so too... is it really a subconscious denial of their masculinity? Or is it more for "ease" and "comfort"? A Q&A at GQ in which the practice is criticized as being effeminate. (Another Q&A, less critical.)

Ladies avoided sitting with their legs apart. (Regardless of whether they were wearing pants or dresses?) But how they adjusted and avoided the fatigue of keeping their legs together varied: crossing at the ankles vs. crossing at the knees (wikihow). According to this internet piece on Victorian manners, it was considered improper for both men and women to cross their legs - I assume that crossing at the knee is meant. According to this link for visitors to Hong Kong, men should try and keep their feet on the floor.

Some letters from NOR

April 2012:

Decoding Casual Dress

Frederick Marks (“The Rush to Radical Informality,” Jan.-Feb.) uncovers a point rarely considered as a cultural phenomenon: the way a narcissistic generation dresses only out of self-regard for comfort. The way people dress in any generation certainly says something about what they think they are, or want to be, but it also indicates a regard for others. In a demoralized culture, neglect of dress expresses moral lethargy. In some New York firms that instituted “casual Fridays,” leisure clothing resulted in leisurely job performance.

Beyond civilian dress, uniforms dispose people to the service of others. This is why priests and judges do not wear whatever they want. And when vesture in churches and courts is slovenly, you can be pretty sure that the officials are more concerned about themselves than about what they represent. If I dress better for a cocktail party than I do when I commune in God’s house, which is my real sanctuary? On the other hand, if I wear a T-shirt in a restaurant, I am clothing myself in the sartorial equivalent of a belch. And if I am in shirtsleeves while the waiter wears a jacket, I am pulling reverse rank on him.

In the prosperous suburbs people dress down for Mass. The best-dressed people in church on Sundays in New York are the poorest: hats and gloves in Harlem and in the neighborhoods populated by immigrants from Haiti and the Caribbean islands. People dress best in storefront churches and worst in the cathedral.

Clothes do not make the man, but they indicate what a man has made of himself. Forms of dress do matter. The baptismal rites refer to the candidate’s white garment (and the candidate is called such precisely because the garment is white, candida) and the Elect before the Throne wear white garments. Christ told a parable about wearing the proper wedding garment and, while it symbolizes baptismal grace, it nonetheless refers to visible raiment as well. The Lord’s garment was seamless, and I suppose it may have been made with devotion by His mother.

What it boils down to is this: God’s inscrutable providence can make slobs into saints, but saints are not slobs.

Fr. George W. Rutler, Pastor
Church of Our Savior
New York, New York

One more:

Frederick Marks makes an excellent point about “radical informality” (Jan.-Feb.): It has spread like a contagious disease in our society. In the old films from the 1930s and 1940s, people getting on and off the subway in New York’s Times Square were well dressed. The men wore a suit, tie, and hat, and the women wore long dresses, a hat, and gloves. That was at a time when most people were poor. Now the dress code there seems to demand, for men, jeans or shorts, a T-shirt, and a baseball cap. The same tendency to “dress down” is apparent in many Catholic churches on Sunday.

When I lived in New York a few years ago, I noticed that the men and women going to the local synagogue on the West Side were well and formally dressed. The same thing was true of those attending Baptist churches in the Bronx or Brooklyn. Proper dress at church shows respect for God. Those with an appointment to meet the governor of a state or the president of the U.S. dress accordingly, as Dr. Marks notes. They dress up for man but not for God.

Radical informality is an assault on form. Form in our culture has taken a big hit since the 17th century. Jay Richards, in his book God and Evolution, points out that Des­cartes identified quantity with essence and thereby eliminated form. We know from Aristotle that there are four causes: material, formal, efficient, and final. Since Descartes, science has discarded formal and final causality; for modern science, the only real causes are material and efficient. One result is that, if there is no form to make a thing be what it is, then each thing is just an accumulation of atoms and molecules that can be arranged in any way. According to this thinking, there is no formal difference between a dog and a cat. And if there is no formal or final cause, then nothing really makes any sense — and you can do or dress as you will.

This metaphysical error is at the root of the fraudulent error of materialistic evolution. It is also, in my opinion, the root of the dominance of the philosophy of relativism in our culture today, or what Pope Benedict XVI has called the “dictatorship of relativism.”

The culture of informality has also influenced priests and religious men and women. It is very common today that priests and religious do not wear their religious garb either in public or in private, contrary to many exhortations from Rome. One reason they give is that it makes it easier for them to associate with the laity. But it seems to me that it is hard for them to influence others as imitators of Christ if no one knows who or what they are.

Fr. Kenneth Baker, S.J.
Editor Emeritus, Homiletic & Pastoral Review
Tacoma, Washington

There is a problem here with an equivocation on the word form? The shape/pattern/design of the clothing may be dictated by some convention, yes. What about casual? Are some designs intrinsically better than others?

The full article to which the letters respond is available to subscribers.

Items of Interest, 2 May 2012

‘Obscure Scribblers’ of the World, Unite!
Dr William Partlett reflects on the best way of overcoming the right-left divide

The Manhunt to Capture Osama Bin Laden

Why the Loyalty Day Declaration is a Good Thing
Vox Day

Judge Napolitano: Eric Holder Could Be Held In Contempt For Non-Response On Fast & Furious

Counterpunch:
PATRICK COCKBURN, Why Osama Lives
DAVE LINDORFF, The Constitutional Crimes of Barack Obama
RUSSELL MOKHIBER, Bribery as a Business Model

Economics and Relocalization:
5 Questions for Woody Tasch

Meet Your Food Chain

USDA Publishes "Regional Food Hub Guide"
USDA? What's its hidden agenda?

David S. D'Amato: Don’t Worry About Occupy

Here's Why Google and Facebook Might Completely Disappear in the Next 5 Years
Looking solely at meeting market demand; not at the deeper question of whether they are sustainable without a consumer base to generate advertising revenue for anyone.

Permaculture:
Celebrate International Permaculture Day
Why permaculture needs accurate data and measurement to persuade the mainstream

Energy:
Richard Heinberg, Top 11 FAQs (EB)
Moving towards ethical energy by Ian Westmoreland (EB)
My Neighbors Use Too Much Energy by Tom Murphy (EB)

Catholic:
Chant Cafe links to this: Four Kinds of Chant
Chant Inspires the Blogosphere
It Is Time to Get Serious About Catholic Social Doctrine

CWR review of Beauty Will Save the World
Rod Dreher, On Beauty Saving the World

The Case for Catholic Teaching: Seminar on Women, Sexuality & The Church
the book
NCRegister
Authentic Freedom and Equality in Difference

Feminism:
An introduction to the investigation into the mental health of female medieval mystics

Diet and Health:
From 2010: Art DeVany on the New Evolution Diet and Exercise Program


MDA: 5 Primal Superfoods for Fertility and Pregnancy

5 Tips to Keep Your Baby's Feet Healthy

Why Do I Wear Five Fingers

Women, Weights, and Bone Density

Music:
NewFound Road - MS


Merlefest 2012 in Pictures


Katie Melua - Moonshine (Live) - Smooth Radio


Sequentia: Thes habet er ubar woroltring - Jaroslaw, 2009


Interview: Violinist Rachel Podger’s sunshine lights up this week’s Tafelmusik concerts

Movies:
BBC to screen four Shakespeare history plays after 30-year gap

TV:
Sherlock: A Character Who's More than Elementary

Etiquette:
Business Casual